Swingers

Bob and Carol and Ted and Alice

Bob and Carol and Ted and Alice

When I arrived home from work today I was completely “shagged”, and not in a good way :) The last month or so has been quite exhausting, and the most energetic thing I could do was check out the EPG and select some programs to watch.

I caught up with “Gruen Transfer” (which was very good), watched a bit of “Lateline”, glanced at “60 Minute Makeover” and then selected a classic movie on 7TWO, “Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice”. It’s a film that I’ve kinda known about for many years, but have never actually watched. It’s firmly set in the late 1960s, and, although it’s concerned with “open relationships” and “swingers” on the surface, more deeply it’s really concerned with “exclusive relationships” and finding depth within monogamy.

It was an interesting choice, since I’ve also been looking at a few internet sites tonight with a view to internet dating. It’s a long time between relationships, and I think it’s probably time to look around again. “What’s with the swinger thing?”, I’ve thought to myself as I went online tonight. “Why are there so many people who look kinda nice and sound kinda interesting, and who then reveal they’re in a relationship, but are looking for a bit on the side?”, I wondered to myself. How can people say they’re looking for a “daytime catchup” when I barely have time for lunch?

I don’t really “get” the swingers thing. I completely understand it’s not for others, and I accept that other people feel differently, but it’s not a part of my nature. Maybe I’m a little old-fashioned, but I think when you make a commitment, you make a commitment. Making a commitment to a relationship is the probably the most important thing you do in your life.

That said, I’m sometimes reminded of a quote where we often make the most important decisions of our lives – relationships, children, jobs etc – with little thought, where we often agonise for days, weeks, over the trivial.

In the end, I thought “Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice” was quite a good film. It kinda reminded me of “Who’s Afraid Of Virginia Wolf?” in the way the actors spoke to each other with apparent honesty.

It’s also interesting the film starts and ends with a scenes where the characters are looking into the eyes of others truly trying to “connect”.

At the end, though, it’s symbolic the closing music is “What The World Needs Now Is Love” by Dionne Warwick.

In the end, I’m guessing I’m the Elliot Gould character who feels most uncomfortable with the open-relationship situation, though without the obvious chest and back hair :) OMG, he has so much back-hair.

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